


Out of time (working title)

by crying_lestat



Category: Star Trek: Enterprise, Star Trek: The Next Generation
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, M/M, Time Travel, Time Travel Fix-It
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-19
Updated: 2017-03-14
Packaged: 2018-09-25 17:01:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,653
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9831662
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crying_lestat/pseuds/crying_lestat





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [DanOfVulcan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/DanOfVulcan/gifts), [ConstableCabbage](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ConstableCabbage/gifts).



"You are so like him. So much like him." Reed whispered. He did not expected that this commander Madden would understand him. He did, apparently, if not everything but at the least the main part. "Do I got it right, LC, that I remind you of someone familiar? Would you mind terribly if I ask you whom exactly?" Reed exhaled in a shuddered breath. "A man... Stupid, right. Commander, you remind me a colleague, a friend. A man I was hoping could become my life-partner. But I never told him this. And I regret it awfully." Commander nodded, Reed saw understanding and compassion in his eyes. And bitter smile twisted his lips. "And I miss him awfully." Commander nodded again. "I understand. I never lost anyone that close as this your friend apparently was to you." Malcolm chuckled mirthlessly. "I thought that I am over it. It seems I'm not. I'm sorry, commander." He turned to the porthole, watching the stars. "No need to apologize, LC. I understand. I saw your face. Your emotions" , and Malcolm felt commander's hand on his shoulder, "It's only natural. I never experienced anything like you did, but I understand what exactly you felt. I do not know how, but I do." Malcolm turned to face him. Commander Madden was smiling. "You may call me Martin if you like." Reed nodded and looked at him again. The resemblance was stunning. Hair a bit longer than he used to see, but the eyes... the same shape, the same wintry gray-green color, even the golden flecks were there, and even tiny birthmark on the left cheek. "I'm sorry, commander... Martin. I'm making you feel uncomfortable, I should not stare." Commander laughed a soft laugh. "Stare as long as you like, it doesn't make me uncomfortable." There was something very familiar in his eyes, in his voice and in his words, that made Reed shudder. "Stare as long as you like, Reed, you're not the first, and I guess, not the last, who's staring at my butt." He remembered these words in decon, and he remembered himself blushing at those words. "What if I want not to just stare, major?" he asked then, he never knew how he found courage to voice this. And the answer left him shell-shocked. "I thought you would never ask." And major was laughing, not at him, as he realized later, but at the whole situation. They had lesser than two months for themselves, and Reed was hoping... dreaming... None of his hopes and dreams came to reality. And now he heard these words again. "Stare as long as you like", in the same voice, with the same half-mocking, half-reassuring tone. "Did I say something wrong, LC?" commander asked, looking at Reed, and he shook his head. "No. No, you did not. I, ah..." he took a deep breath and felt himself like he was going to dive into deep dark cold water. "I want to ask you about something... very personal." Commander nodded, and Reed continued in shaky voice. "It's... it might be too personal, and rude too." Martin looked at him, then tilted his head a bit, clearly intrigued. "If it doesn't involve asking about my academy years and my early career, ask, please." Malcolm bit his lip, and then dove into these metaphysical deep cold water. "Would you mind roll your left sleeve up... Martin?" Commander shrugged. "I'm not sure why you asking about this, but no, I don't mind." He unbuttoned his sleeve and rolled it. And Reed suddenly was stunned. He thought that he'll die right here, right now, because this wasn't possible, but somehow it was. He pressed his palm to his mouth and tears that he was holding for years suddenly broke free. "It... I'm sorry. commander." And then he turned away and ran out of the lounge, leaving commander in deep confusion.  
He remembered it so clearly. Long thin scar around major's forearm, Malcolm tend to like tracing it with his fingertips. There was nothing remarkable in this scar, but he did remember it. He remembered thin white line going through couple of birthmarks, splitting them in two. And commander Martin Madden has exactly same thin long scar, almost invisible, but it was splitting exact same birthmarks in exact same way like it did on major's skin.  
***  
"Alright. Breathe in. Breathe out. Okay. Easy, easy, 's okay. Wassup with ya?" Trip's worried drawl calmed him down a bit. Malcolm looked up at the commander. "Have you saw commander Madden?" Trip frowned and shook his head. "Nope. Not yet. Wassup?" Reed sighed and pinched bridge of his nose. "I cannot explain it, Trip. I do not understand what's up. It's like I was thrown back in time instead jumping forward onboard 'Enterprise'. I feel myself like I've seen a ghost. But he isn't, that's the problem, and he isn't the one... Look, you'll see yourself. I, ah... Sorry, Trip. I cannot talk about it right now. I'd like to come back to our 'Enterprise', if you don't mind." Trip's expression turned to deep concern. "Ah don'mind, but Mal, r u sure?" Reed turned away from this concerned stare. "Yes. I'm sure. I just... need to think. Alone. And in familiar place." Trip nodded, wondering what had happened, but it was useless to ask Malcolm about.   
*  
A photo. Something no one never saw. It was too private, it was their. One day Hayes just brought it to Reed, trying hard not to laugh, and when Malcolm saw it, he reddened cherry-red to the tips of his ears. "What?.. How?.. Where, for god's sake, did you get it?" And Hayes just shrugged in answer. "It was Mac. She knows." Malcolm kept this photo for himself since... Jeremiah was gone. No-one knew that it even exist, and he wasn't into telling anybody about what they had with major Hayes. With Jeremiah. That photo, he wondered when and how McKenzie caught them both without noticing her. But then again they were too busy to notice anyone at that moment. Malcolm smiled at the memory, he could almost feel that lips on his own, even now. And he almost used to be alone just with his memories, he still could not let Jeremiah go.   
"I want to apologize if I contributed to..."  
 _"I'm sorry for treating you like this."_  
Ghost of smile on his lips, smile in his eyes.  
"We all are the part of the same crew."  
 _"I do not blame you. I'm with you now."_  
"We'll bring her home."  
Malcolm wanted to say so much, like "Be careful" or "Come back alive" or even "I need you", but he didn't. He wanted to say so much after their return... but he never got a chance.  
And now it was commander Martin Madden, whose eyes and voice were exactly the same, and the scar on his arm was exactly the same, and all of this should not be. But he was, he is and... he's here. Just right here before Malcolm's eyes, smiling apologetically.   
"Have I done something wrong?"   
Apparently Reed haven't noticed the transporter's beam, too deep in his memories. And he didn't say anything, he simply handed the photo to annoying commander, watching as his expression changed from curious to almost frightened. Then he spoke.  
"Now you see yourself... Martin. There's nothing wrong. You are just so like him, even in the small details, and I do not understand how this can be. Maybe you have the answers if you are here." Commander Madden shook his head. "No. I don't. I don't... Because I want to find some answers myself."


	2. Chapter 2

"Arik Soong? You really knew him?" Reed nodded. "Yes, commander Data. I cannot say I knew him closely, but yes, I saw him, and... I guess, you can search the rest in Starfleet database." Data appeared to be excited even by this answer. "I know the facts, mister Reed, but meeting a man who knew my ancestor, even by the short time, means a lot to me." Reed shot a helpless look to Martin, who apparently was used to this. "Look, Data, you can talk with mister Reed later, and now we need your help." Android tilted his head. "Yes? What kind of help?" Commander Madden glanced at Reed, and he mouthed "yes".   
"So, Data. Search all facts that connected to major Jeremiah Matthew Hayes. He was commanding officer of MACO unit on Enterprise NX-01, year 2153. I - we - wonder what happened to him. And commander, if you'll find encrypted files, you have my permission to decrypt them. It could be really important."  
*  
_"Why you told me that I should stay on the ship?"_  
_"Because you and your men are more valuable to the ship. You know that."_  
_"But it's not all, isn't it?"_  
_"You are so annoying, Reed, you are in bed, with me, could you shut up for the moment?"_  
_"I will, but only after you'll answer me, why."_  
_"Because you are over-protective, Malcolm. And it's not your job, to go out there and to die. I know that you will do that, and I don't want it. It's MACO job, not yours."_  
_"I hate you even more now. But please... Don't do your job. Don't die out there."_  
Malcolm went too deep into his memories and for the second time in one day haven't noticed Martin near him. "You are wandering somewhere, LC. Penny for your thoughts." Reed drummed his fingers on the bar counter. "I guess I am. Haven't done this for a while, and now all these memories... I thought I'm able to control it. It seems I'm not. Anyway, any word from Data?" Commander Madden shrugged. "He said he's in progress of data-mining, and if I only knew was it some kind of his jokes or he really onto something." Reed snorted. 'An android who have sense of humor? How interesting. I'm serious, it's a wonder to see how humanity developed in two centuries. I never thought I'll be able to see it one day."  
_"Maybe one day when things get better..."_  
_"I don't think they will."_  
_"Pessimistic as ever. Who taught you that?"_  
_"Life experience. There's nothing I can do. Also, off the record, I'm not pessimistic. I'm just being realistic, that's all. Also, you told me to shut up, and now you are talking yourself. Do you think it's fair?"_  
_"Sorry. But what if..."_  
_"There's no "what if" right now, Jay. There's only "now". And speaking about now, how about not spending what little time left to the alpha-shift on empty talks?"_  
"Dreaming again?" Commander Madden brought him a shot of bourbon. "I thought you might like it." Malcolm looked up at him and said nothing. His hands started to tremble and he clasped them. "Yes. Thank you." Martin sat near to him. "Speaking about Data... The crew told me that he changed. Well, essentially it's not Data, but also he is." Reed took a small sip, tasting the liquor and then tilted his head. "How so?" Martin shrugged. "From what I know and from what i gathered about what's happened, commander Data was killed in action", and at these words Reed shuddered, but commander haven't noticed it apparently and continued, "But before that he kind of transferred his memories to another android, who was, if i understood correctly, his prototype. Underdeveloped. But after commander Data's death, that prototype started to evolve, and very fast. It appeared, that not only commander's memories were transferred, but also his personality. And one day that prototype, his name was B-4, came onto the bridge and said "Hello, Data is here, permission to take my station". Captain was so emotional about this. From what I myself saw, I'd never called B-4 a 'prototype'. But so it is.", his comm beeped, and he said "Sorry, Malcolm. Madden. Yes, Data. On our way", and then he told to Malcolm, "Data found something. He said it's very important."  
*  
"It is important. Though it is not connected to your request directly. Apparently, after NX-01 was pulled into temporal vortex, something happened in the timeline. I clearly remember that i read information about first crew, and I haven't noticed that certain crew members and senior officers were declared as KIA and MIA. But now it is. Also", Data pointed to two files marked as "top secret", "these two files remaining "top secret" since 2154, February 13. I have enough level of clearance, but there's the other problem. I am programmed not to violate Temporal Prime Directive." Reed looked suspiciously at the android, then at commander Madden. This information haven't made anything clear, but remark about temporal prime directive pushed his thoughts to quite specific direction. "What is Temporal Prime Directive, commander?" he asked Data. "We, or anyone, should not intervene in timelines different to our own and we should not cause any changes to these timelines, if to be short. There's more to that, of course, but main principles are so." Reed looked one more time to commander Madden, he nodded. And finally realization dawned in Malcolm's mind. He knew now what he should do, and he will do this. "Data, could you upload these secret files to my PADD? Apparently, this temporal directive doesn't apply to me."  
*  
Reed got these files with the permission of commander Madden, who seemed to be interested no less than Reed himself. "I'll tell captain that I approved it, so you don't have to worry." And Malcolm started to decipher this files, wondering what's there. Martin's presence calmed his nerves, like it was around Jeremiah, and he reminded himself that this is not Jeremiah, and he should not even think about it. Computer beeped, signaling of finished decryption. Reed wondered again about technical progress and opened the first decrypted file.  
"I should have known!" he growled, and commander Madden turned to him with unspoken question - exactly like Jeremiah. Malcolm looked at him, his expression was angry and grim. "Daniels-sss" he hissed through clenched teeth. He should have known, indeed.


	3. Chapter 3

Andorian ale left bitter taste in his mouth. That should not have happened, too weird, some undisclosed plans within plans, and what was the point of acquiring major's dead (well, apparently not dead at that time) body. Commander Madden was as much shocked as Reed himself. There was the only question left for now, and this question was "Why?" Why Daniels did that, why he needed to do that, why he didn't tell Malcolm about what he did. That, at the least, would’ve ease the pain, knowing that the man he loves, and Malcolm finally admitted that to himself, still alive though far far away and out of reach. Second file gave them nothing, it was in some language none of them understood, and after the UT could not adapt to it, Malcolm send it to Hoshi , hoping that maybe she could fish something out of it. Her answer was disappointing. "It isn't a language per se. It's a cypher I can't decrypt. It requires a key, an old-fashioned style, and without a key I cannot do anything. I see that it's definitely some kind of text, some blocks are repeating, and I'd probably be able to decipher it, if it was real language, existing language. And from what I see, it's some kind of quasi-language or synthetic language, perhaps used by only one person. I'm sorry, Mal. I'm afraid I'm no help with it."  
_"How you got that scar?"_  
_"What scar? Ah. I have it since I was a kid. It's silly. Do you really want to know it?"_  
_"Mm-hmm. I want to know more about you."_  
_"I was ten. We played Cowboys and Indians, me and neighbor kids, twins. One of them stole my mother's guitar string and tied my hands with it. It dug too deep into my forearm, because I tried to twist my hands out. It was steel string and I was as stupid as a little kid could be. When they untied me, I pulled it out and... There wasn't that much blood so I just wrapped my arm with my bandana. I was the cowboy, huh. Mom noticed that anyway, and probably that saved my arm. So that's all the story."_  
_"Sounds a bit creepy to me. Cruel games you played."_  
_"No. I was just stupid and we were kids. But thank you for caring."_  
Jeremiah always heard what Reed wanted to say but never said out loud. He always could find these hidden messages. But now Malcolm regretted he never—or almost never said what he wanted to say. And Jeremiah wasn't around and probably never would be anymore.  
Malcolm remembered talking to Jay later about his mother's guitar, just because he wanted to talk about something, and he remembered Jay telling him that he himself plays guitar, "But don't tell my mom. She would probably disinherit me for my lousy skills", and Malcolm remembered them both laughing at it and scaring captain Archer. They both admitted later that it was their little spontaneous revenge for that mess with insectoids hatchery. Now all of that was gone.  
*  
Trip found his friend in observation lounge, Malcolm was pretty drunk already, at least Trip thought that he was drunk, judging by amount of empty bottles of Andorian ale, but there was one thing about Malcolm Reed, even when he was drunk, he never lost his awareness of what's going on around him. He said it when Enterprise took her first flight after Xindi war that he sometimes drinks only to lessen the pain, that is too much. Trip thought that time about physical pain or injuries that haven't been healed, but later he realized what pain Malcolm talked about. He felt the same pain when Lizzie were gone. He never knew though what or who was the reason, the source of his pain, and Malcolm refused to tell him.  
"Hey, Mal, quit that shit!" Reed looked at him over his glass. "Ah. Good ol'Trip came to rescue. No need, I'm fine. I have a day off t'morrow. Strange days, strange things, all of it happened and we don't know why. Any guesses?" Trip exhaled quietly. Malcolm really wasn't that drunk as he expected. He shook his head. "Ya scared helluwa lot of me, Mal. Need a partner?" Reed looked at him again, this time with well-known wry smile on his face. "Help yourself, commander. And don't call me 'Mal' or I'll kill you." Trip barked a short laugh. "An'here is Malcolm Reed I know. Thanks." he took bottle of ale and made a swig. "Shit! How d'ya even?.. This thing coulda burn your guts, ugh. S'bout guesses... I don't know anything. Johnny is there, with capt'n Picord or so, I just cant speak it right, and what I know is they talking 'bout that goddamn vortex and what to do with that shit, I dunno. Johnny is kinda jumpy now. He thinks we're stuck 'ere." Trip tried to look Malcolm in the eyes but he averted his gaze. "You know, Trip... I wouldn't mind stay here for a while. It's a bit selfish of me, but I never ever wanted anything for myself. Now it's probably the very first time in my life when I do." Trip raised his eyebrow. "What'cha talking 'bout? Mal?" Then he saw Reed's blushing and laughed wholeheartedly. "I'll be damned! You found someone here?" Reed blushed even deeper and whispered "No. And yes." Trip winked and raised his bottle in a salute. "To ya all. I'll be damned..."  
***  
"My, my. And you told me I'm drunk. Look at yourself, commander. Just can anybody tell me why I'm always dragging your sorry floridian drunken ass back to your cabin, huh? Jesus good Lord in Heaven, Trip! Could you stand still for a while?" Malcolm wasn't that annoyed as he tried to look, but drunken commander Tucker wasn't something he wanted right now. He haven't expected that Trip would spill out everything he kept for himself almost like Malcolm did, but there was one thing - Malcolm wasn't surprised, when Trip confessed about him and captain Archer. He knew that for a while. "Yes, commander, I know. Part of my job, actually, to know what is happening, mostly to prevent outcomes which can affect ship and crew well-beings in unacceptable ways." Trip was stunned for some moment and after that moment he almost screamed that he finally have someone to talk to. And now Malcolm was dragging him back to his quarters swearing in process. When he keyed the code and tried to drag his friend inside, Trip stumbled and nearly fell onto him, giggling. "Go to sleep, Tucker, for God's sake!" Reed grumbled, but it did not stopped Trip from giggling more. "One day I'd know who d'ya laid eye on, Mal." Reed rolled his eyes and said nothing.  
***  
After dealing finally with drunken engineer, Malcolm was about to go to his own quarters, but comm buzz stopped him in halfway. "Reed", he answered, and was quite surprised when he heard "Madden here. Would you mind to keep me company?" That was something Malcolm never expect. "I don't mind. See you soon."


	4. Chapter 4

"I do not know what to do with the information you gathered, Malcolm. We encountered a lot of strange, unexpected things, but this..." commander Madden trailed off. Reed nodded and offered him unopened bottle of Andorian ale. "It's genuine, not replicated. And Martin, I'm so sorry for dragging you into all this. You don't have to help me, you know?" Madden glanced at Reed, took the bottle and set it on the table. "Thank you. Malcolm, since you are here, in our timeline, I guess I must help you as much as I can." There was something in his eyes that almost made Malcolm launch himself and hug him. 'No, it would not be appropriate. not now, not - ever. You barely know him, and you already want to...' - what? What exactly he wants? To comfort a man who became his friend in these few days, nothing more, and he knows perfectly where to stop. Martin relieved him of these thoughts, he took Malcolm's hand in his. That was almost forgotten feeling, for Malcolm never allowed anyone to touch him, especially like that. "Look, Malcolm, don't worry about me, of making me uncomfortable or of any other things you might have to think. Just don't. I'm here, and I'll help you." Reed felt warmth of another man's skin, he felt tiny movements of Martin's fingers, when he rubbed slightly his hand, and it was too much for him now, because it was too familiar at almost uncanny level, but he did not tried to stop it, he wanted it, just this little human touch of a man who reminded him his lost love so much. 'You do not want a substitute, don't you? It's not like you'. The same annoying voice in the back of his head. Reed allowed himself to ignore it. He barely heard what Martin was saying to him. "I want to help you to find out what had happened, because I feel myself connected to it, and... maybe you'll say that I have nothing to do with that, but I have. I feel myself responsible for... for hurting you. Again." He let Reed's hand, and Reed felt that he's already miss the contact. "You're not hurting me, comm... Martin. Quite on contrary, you're probably healing me. Thank you." Malcolm looked at him and saw that smile he missed so much, like Jeremiah smiled, not much with his mouth, but with his eyes. The urge to believe that this is Jeremiah, the urge to kiss him was overwhelming, and Malcolm barely resisted this urge. He shook his head, as if he tried to make the vision of his lover go away. "I shouldn't come here. It's still too much." he said, suddenly feeling himself empty. He stood up and turned to the door, he wanted to leave now, and as soon as possible.  
Later, in his own quarters, he thought that probably his world, maybe not just his, maybe that the whole world turned upside down, because at those his words commander Madden, Martin, who reminded him so much of Jeremiah, rose up too, and in two steps closed the distance between them. "Don't." he remembered the words. And he remembered being embraced, inhaling unfamiliar scent and feeling warmth of another body. "Don't leave, Malcolm. Please, don't." He left anyway, not in a hurry anymore, but all he wanted now is to stay there, and that was impossible.  
***  
"Da fuck capt'n wants to see us? Ideas?" Reed shook his head. "Not one. How's your head? Maybe you should visit sickbay first?" Trip snorted. "T'hell with da sickbay, Phlox is worse than my hangover. 'Sides, Johnny sounded upset." Malcolm chuckled. "Who wouldn't be if his lover is drunk as log." Trip rolled his eyes. "Ah gonna strangle ya, Reed. Ah hate ya. Lover, huh. Johnny stuck with da damn bald captain, ugh!" Malcolm laughed out loud with that sentence, "Now thank you, commander, for this image you just planted to my head. I guess it would be exceptionally hard to hold straight face now." Tucker blinked few times and then laughed himself almost hysterically, "Well, thanks, Mal, now AH got the image too. Shit..."  
They indeed tried too hard not to giggle in front of quite upset captain Archer. His reason to be upset was clear, as he explained that NX-01 and her crew could not return to their timeline, because temporal vortex they've been pulled in was caused by some another ship, and yet the crew of Enterprise-E are searching for warp-signature of that ship to restore temporal vortex with exact same parameters, and while they are searching for it, captain Picard offered for NX-01 crew to move temporarily to Enterprise-E. This offer was what captain Archer disliked at most.  
And Malcolm also disliked this offer. "I would not abandon the ship", he said to Trip when they talked in the mess after the briefing and Jonathan's lecture about drinking too much. "I cannot abandon the ship." Trip sighed. "I'll talk to Johnny. He's stubborn as you, limey. Hate you both." Malcolm chuckled, "Tell this to him, and I'll watch. Trip, you know that I cannot do that. You can try and talk captain into moving to Enterprise-E with you, and I guess he'll even won't resist as much as it seems. But i cannot." Trip poked his food with fork and glanced at Reed. "Mal, look, s'not the best idea to stay here, I tell ya. The ship will run on third of max power, why ya wanna stay s'much?" And Reed looked down, to his own plate, for just not to see Trip's concerned eyes. "I cannot tell you, commander." Now engineer's look turned from concerned to disbelieving. "And yesterday ya told me ya wanna stay. Something isn't right, I tell ya what. I know ya fer years, Mal. Don't even try." And Reed decided finally to tell his closest friend what happened. About Jeremiah, about his feelings and about commander Martin Madden too.  
To say that Trip was surprised and kind of shocked was to say nothing. But being endless optimist by his nature, he tried to find bright side even in what happened with Malcolm, though it wasn't easy. "Look, Mal, I'm not saying it's easy, but I guess this universe gave ya second chance. Take it, Mal. Please. Do it. And I'll be here fer ya. D'ya hear me?" Reed nodded almost absently. It was easy for Trip to say this, not really, but definitely easier than it was for Reed himself. And if not second chance, then at the least it could be good friendship, even for a little time.   
"Yes, Trip. I'll try. I cannot promise though that something will come out of it. But I'll try..."


End file.
